CRY ME A LAGOON

Well, it was either that heading or "crocodile tears," but I know some people get exercised over the difference between crocs and alligators, the real topic of this post: Florida Gator Shows Declining. Ohhh NOOO! Poor Steve Irwin died just in time! ...oops, sorry. Alligators. Right.

Years ago, one animal-wrestler said, these shows drew more than 400 visitors and he could make about $500 a day in tips. But times have changed, and the article notes that "today's tourists would rather ride on Everglades air boats and view wildlife in its natural habitat." Natural habitat!?!?!? WTF?

"The lessons are being taught in their own home, without harming any animals. So that's the positive side," Peacock said. "The negative side is, did I waste the last 17 years of my life learning how to do this?"

Yes. Yes you did. Too bad it only occurs to you now that your way of life was a complete croc.

...sorry again, I mean, man, that really bites.